Weary Birthdays
It IS The Baby's birthday today, and I baked her a grand total of zero cakes.
Late April and early May are SERIOUSLY birthday packed months for us - all of our living grandmothers, my parents, two of the kids' uncles, most of our aunts and uncles, tons of cousins by the score and both of my daughters all saw fit to jam themselves into a three week period that I like to refer to as Cakemas. Or I would refer to it as that if I wasn't so busy eating birthday cake every five minutes and having permanent elastic marks under my chin from wearing one of those pointy birthday hats for three solid weeks. And yet I managed to not make my own CHILD a birthday cake today. I was busy.
Today was yet another in a series of just TERRIFIC medical tests due to last week's troubles, and living where I do, I have to go out of town to have my apparently-fascinating clockwork peered at, which meant I've been gone from my home since 6:30 this morning and didn't get home until 7 p.m., birthday girl in tow. My mom, bless her, stepped in and made The Baby her requested supper - spaghetti - and The Girl made her a gluten-free chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and it was great. I don't have to make everything myself, even though I feel like I should.
My older kids slept at my parent's house last night - we had too early a morning planned to get them off to school, so it made sense - but I woke up in the middle of the night and just felt bereft without them, two of my kids sleeping away from me and the other quietly turning a year older in the dark room beside me and we left home in the misty quiet morning, The Baby clutching her new Barbie to her chest and weeping with exhaustion. And she was such a trooper during a very long day, waiting in hospital waiting rooms and being astonishingly patient for a just-now three year old, and I think that we will make cupcakes again tomorrow, even though the rest of this week - and several weeks to come - are rather ripe with birthday cakes, because she's a good girl and three years ago today I held her in my arms and thought "Oh, I KNOW you." No matter how lovely tonight was, I still want her to have part of her birthday from my hands. So tomorrow, we're going to blend our gluten free flours and our butter and eggs and sugar and make lemon cupcakes, for how sweet and sad life is, for my Baby, my tough, tired-out little kid who is THREE already.
Spagetti by grandma, chocolate cake by big sister and then cupcakes the next day by you??? Sounds like a great birthday to me with many loving touches by the family. Hope all is well with you. And happy birthday to the Baby!!
Posted by: Marta | April 26, 2008 at 02:14 PM
I know EXACTLY what you mean about the birthday cake not really counting because it wasn't made by YOU. I feel that way too.
Posted by: Pieces | April 24, 2008 at 11:02 AM
Until I had my daughter, I never once stopped to think what my birthday meant to my mother. It was all about nice dinners out and gifts and fun. It is one of the "shockers" about becoming an adult, I guess. Now with each approaching birthday, I know my Mom must be whistfully thinking about the day I was born, some thirty-odd years ago, and wondering where the time went. I know I share what you described, Beck, thinking so vividly about the moment my daughter was born on her birthday - must be another one of those "universals" that bond us all as moms. Just one of those things that comes along with motherhood that nobody tells you about!
Posted by: Melissa | April 23, 2008 at 01:22 PM
Poor baby and poor you.
I hope the cupcakes help.
Posted by: lisa b | April 22, 2008 at 10:08 PM
It's a good thing this glut of birthday cakes doesn't come in the dead of winter when you would have no ambition whatsoever so be outside working off some cake. We have three celebratory weekends in a row here and I for one, cannot WAIT for cake!! Yippee!
Posted by: bren j. | April 22, 2008 at 07:55 PM
Nothing wrong with extending the birthday over two days, especially if the first one was spent in hospitals, etc. How great of the girl to maker her the cake - following right along in your footsteps:) I hope all the tests go well for you.
Posted by: Mary Beth | April 22, 2008 at 11:45 AM
my daughter's birthday is thursday and i am getting desperately sad about it. sorry to hear all about the medical tests. i hated those blood tests, etc. that they make you do after. . .
take care, beck.
Posted by: christine | April 22, 2008 at 10:23 AM
Yay, The Girl! The rest of us big sisters are proud of you. And yay, The Baby! Happy, happy birthday! (I like it when birthdays last more than one day. Enjoy your cupcakes.)
Posted by: Nowheymama | April 22, 2008 at 09:43 AM
Happy Birthday Baby, and Beck I hope everything is okay for you too.
Posted by: chantal | April 22, 2008 at 09:42 AM
Awww... Happy Birthday again, sweet Baby. Your mama sure loves you!
Posted by: tracey | April 22, 2008 at 08:48 AM
Happy Birthday to the baby. I'm so sorry your day was so rotten :(
Posted by: Julie | April 22, 2008 at 08:22 AM
I'm sorry you had to spend such a special day in such a vacuous setting. Hey, did you see my step-dad on your ventures? It's a surprise that you wouldn't even know him. But he's there, in that very hospital probably, waiting and waiting. I'm glad there will be cake-ettes today. LET THEM EAT CAKE!
Posted by: erin | April 22, 2008 at 08:16 AM
Aw. You always make me cry. How do you do that? I hope the tests are over now and you can just BE. And eat cake.
Posted by: Megan (FriedOkra) | April 22, 2008 at 07:46 AM
So sorry to hear that you are still dealing physically ( as well as emotionally, I know) with last week's tragedy. Time. It takes time, along with God's grace and mercy to heal.
What a wonderful, supportive mother and Girl you have. And the cupcakes? They'll be perfect as you bake them together.
Posted by: Tracy | April 22, 2008 at 07:40 AM
That's lots of Birthdays to celebrate! What better gift than a barbie doll for a girl whose eyes are like angels'.
Happy Birthday Baby!
Posted by: Angeline | April 22, 2008 at 06:26 AM
So sweet that sister made her a cake. How loving. Happy Birthday, Baby!
Posted by: Victoria | April 22, 2008 at 05:28 AM
Happy birthday, Baby.
Posted by: Kyla | April 22, 2008 at 12:45 AM
Happy, happy birthday to the Baby! I'm impressed that the Girl made the birthday. What a wonderful sister!
Posted by: Susanne | April 22, 2008 at 12:08 AM
Our birthday-palooza is December. Yeah! Heaps of cake and muffins AND Christmas cookies. Shazaam!
Oooh. A Barbie. I love Barbie! Lucky lucky The Baby.
Posted by: AlphaDogMa | April 21, 2008 at 11:10 PM
Yay for the the Girl coming through in a pinch! Chocolate on chocolate followed by lemon sounds just the right thing to celebrate such a LARGE accomplishment of turning 3. Happy Birthday to the the Baby!!!
Posted by: Becky | April 21, 2008 at 10:41 PM
So sweet and sad and precious. Happy birthday to your little lady and congrats to your older lady that she managed a cake for her sister and now you rest and know that God is good, even when everything else seems to be off kilter.
Posted by: Heather Young | April 21, 2008 at 10:15 PM
I am also floored by the fact that your sweet big Girl baked a cake for little big girl...
And cupcakes and cakes all week sound perfect...this was beautiful.
Posted by: Aliki | April 21, 2008 at 09:56 PM
I know that feeling of wanting to do things even if you don't HAVE to; of even when life is overwhelming, trying to make special times for your kids. But know that your kids will remember all those other special times, and that it will all smooth out in the end to a happy childhood.
Hope she loves those lemon cupcakes! 3 is (at times) such a delightful age.
Posted by: edj | April 21, 2008 at 09:50 PM
Happy times during sad times. Thank goodness that He bears our griefs and carries our sorrows.
Aren't you just so proud of The Girl for making her sister a cake? I sure would be!
Posted by: Minnesotamom | April 21, 2008 at 09:45 PM
so sweet. 3 is practically grown! it makes you so miss the baby stage.
Posted by: chickadee | April 21, 2008 at 09:16 PM
I think it is sweet that her big sister made her cake! How fitting is it that your knowledge, your love, your talent is being passed along. I hope you are feeling better.
Posted by: Rosebud & Papoosie Girl | April 21, 2008 at 09:15 PM
may I just say that I hope you are well and that I am super-impressed by your girl making her little sister a just right birthday cake. How sweet is that?!
Posted by: Karen | April 21, 2008 at 09:11 PM