I have known since I had my second child that I was done. No more babies for me. I no longer had that feeling, that ache. I was content and my family felt complete. Occasionally I would wonder but no sooner had the thought entered my mind then it would leave again. And with my big step into my 40's this year, I knew for sure.
But obviously others still have doubts. This week my sister was visiting from the UK with her 5 1/2 month old son and one day, while she spent her time in meetings, I got to hang out with the baby. It was wonderful. He is a happy, easy going baby and we had many adventures.
Here we are on a date at Starbucks. A great way to start our day together!
But everywhere I went people I knew saw me and asked, "Doesn't it make you want one?" or "Looks good on you! Time for another?"
Listen everyone, I love my little nephew and my niece, his toddler sister, but I am DONE. Spending the day with this little guy was a joy. Truly. I didn't mind the diapers, the spit up, the rocking to sleep or the over-excited-grouchy-what-the-hell-do-you-need moments. I loved his soft, warm skin, his kissable cheeks and his gummy smile. I squeezed him and smelled him the whole day. But I still don't want one of my own!
MY baby getting to be the Big Kid.
My Big Boy entertaining the Little Boy.
I can't explain it. The urge is gone. Completely. It doesn't make me a baby hater. In fact, I probably enjoyed him more today than I did my own simply because I ate it all up. Every second was pure bliss. Because it was limited. It may sound obnoxious but I like my full night's sleep and my thought provoking conversations with my kids. We have moved on and I am perfectly happy with getting my baby fix every now and then from somewhere else.
What about you? How did you know when you were done? Do you ever wish you could or did have more children?
I totally get it. There is an intrinsic feeling that you just have. You just know.
And I didn't have it until after Eva. I thought I was done after Cuy and was happy with my two boys. I would tell people we were done. There were no plans for anymore.
After Eva came - there was the feeling of utter completion. NOW I know what "done" feels like.
I love little baby snuggles but the desire for more of my own is gone. I loved being pregnant but I NEVER want to be pregnant again.
It's a good feeling. Being done. And knowing it.
Love your post. I feel exactly the same way. I love babies - other people's! My kids are kids now - we have actual conversations and they ask me thought-provoking questions. They can fix their own snacks and bathe themselves and all sorts of good things. They sleep all night and if they wake up before me they read or watch tv quietly or get their breakfast. I loved my babies, but I don't want to go back. Enjoying little snippets of babydom is ideal.
I love children in a crazy way so I chose work that included them. Can't say I ever felt done. If/when I remarry I won't be able to make a baby with that person and that is actually sad.
I could eat the face of your nephew for lunch.
I am totally with you! Indeed though... how lovely it is to hold another's bundle for just a while.
It was divine, Anne. He was SO edible!
Dog?
I'd have another baby before I'd have a dog, Marianne! I am SO not a pet person.
Honestly, I think we're good. Two great kids, a crazy and fun small business to run and a couple of cute little cousins for my kiddies. Perfection.
I am with you COMPLETELY lady!! And because I have no urges, I can happily cuddle other people's wee babes, and hand them back without any kind of wistful feelings. (And the same thing goes for dogs.)
I'm with you. I knew after my last one that he was going to be my "last one". Such a treat to spend a whole day with one! You are lucky. I am the youngest in my family so I don't have any little nieces or nephews to cuddle now. When anyone asks if I want more (which is insane, I have four already people!!!) I just tell them I am going to make a fabulous grandmother. That's enough baby for now.
I have two wonderful & healthy boys that I love with all my heart. One is almost 15 and the other is 6. There will always be a little part of me wishes she had a girl too! I do get a urge to have an other baby sometimes but that is not going to happen lol The urge quickly passes.
Two children is a nice round number and it seems that most family deals are made for families of four. My husband got "fixed" ;-) a few years after my last one was born. Just because I can have children does not mean that I should keep having them.
I am now 35 years old. The good part about having children when I was younger is that they will move out when I am still "young". Then I will have time for my husband and me :)
Someday I will have grand children (better be a long way away) lol I will love them and spoil them. Till then I have fun with my nieces and nephews and friends children.
Jen I love those pics of your kids with your nephew. so cute. I'm in the mind now that I would love to have another. But - I could never do it myself. And I'm so blessed that Will is healthy - I feel I'd be tempting fate to do it again. So, I'll count myself lucky and stop at one!