I love this photo. For one thing I think it is photographically really cool but also, it captures such a joyful moment. My son plays competitive hockey and on this particular occasion they had won the tournament they had entered. The weekend had been jam packed with fun, camaraderie, adventure and a whole bunch of hockey. A dream for my 10 year-old guy.

But now, as any hockey parent knows, we are getting into the Season of the Unknown. This time of year is when it starts and it won't be over until tryouts are done and your child has a spot on a team. It is now when the coaches start to hint as to whether your child has what it takes, is on the bubble, or may need to start looking elsewhere. It can be very stressful for parents and for kids as you ride the wave looking ahead but not always sure what the future holds.

My husband and I are a bit divided about this. Yes, it is stressful. I don't like the unknown. But I also see it as an opportunity. My husband? Not so much. He thinks it is too stressful for a kid and too much pressure. I feel that this is a great opportunity for kids to learn about a) choices b) disappointment and c) hard work. I don't like the fact that my guy wants to stay on his team but may not make it back next year. I want him to have what he wants. However, life is not like that and why not learn it now when he has a soft place to fall?

Don't get me wrong, I think my son should make it back to his team next year because, well, in my unbiased opinion, he's awesome. But I'm no hockey expert so I can't say how the coaches see it. He, like most of the kids, have been told there are things he needs to work on so we have had lots of chats about whether he thinks he can do these things and whether he wants to put in the work necessary to getting them done. He has decided he can and he does. What a great opportunity to prove to himself that he is capable. This is about him. This is about taking constructive feedback and making a choice. Do you listen or not? Do you value the feedback or not? Do you want to work hard to do what it takes or not? Do you want to risk disappointment or not? These are real life lessons that my boy gets to practice now. We will support him regardless but the decision has to be his.

My son chose to play competitive sports so now he has to deal with the reality. If he can't or doesn't want to then that is OK too. He has learned something. But if he does then he has learned that he is capable and a whole slew of other wonderful things too. The reason I feel that a little pressure, a little competition, and a little responsibility are all good is because he will learn so much about himself and his abilities and what makes him happy now so he won't be stuck figuring it out as an adult. My husband, on the other hand, is worried. He's worried that it's too much pressure, competition, responsibility, and, potentially, disappointment for a kid. He will have to deal with these things in adulthood, why put it on a child?

So, we talk to our son and use him as the compass. For now, he wants to do it. He says he is prepared to deal with all of it and feels confident in his ability to cope whatever direction this goes in. We support him and will be there as a soft place should he fall.