The Balancing Act

What makes a Restaurant Kid-Friendly?

2010-03-15T03:59:44Z

We went out for lunch yesterday with our three kids and it was actually fun.

Sometimes it's not fun. In fact, there are occasions when dining out with them is an absolute nightmare.

However, when it's fun, it's great. It means exploring new foods together, sharing an experience, and it's one less meal to clean up at home.

We dined at Memories of Japan (see left)on Don Mills Road (Toronto). Here's why it was fun:

1. The space was bright, airy, clean and spacious. Our table was big, the kids could walk around and explore. The atmosphere was busy but not congested. Gone are the days of eating in cosy, intimate spaces. Let's face it, those spaces don't want us. We need somewhere where we can fade into the business and go unnoticed. Inevitably, there will be a spill, a meltdown or worse, and small spaces make our drama too conspicuous.

2. Sushi is interactive. My kids ordered their maki and then went up to the sushi bar to watch the chef prepare their meal. They LOVED this. They giggled and oohed and aahed as their lunch was rolled up into neat little seaweed-covered wonders.

3. The food arrived quickly. The time factor is one thing many restaurants don't get when it comes to kids. There is a very limited window within which my kids can behave themselves in a public setting. After that point, it's all downhill and no-one is safe. Ideally, a kid-friendly restaurant gets your order on the table within ten to fifteen minutes, as it did at MOJ.

4. The servers were friendly and comfortable with small children. There's nothing worse than going out to eat and feeling like the waiter hates you and your kids. This happened to us at a brunch place on the Danforth, and we left before the food arrived. A server who chats and engages the kids makes the whole experience more enjoyable.

5. Good food. Last but not least, the food has to be good. I'm not willing to sacrifice delicious food for a kid-friendly environment. But, would I go somewhere that has great food, but is not welcoming to my kids? No way. Times have changed, and my needs are different. Ten years ago, my husband and I would not hesitate to suffer through hole-in-the-wall decor, terrible service and/or snobbish servers all in the name of a delicious meal. That is no longer the case. There has to be a happy medium wherein our kids are content, and the food is enjoyable.

A few restaurants which fit the bill are Joey's, Boston Pizza, Udupi Palace, Pantheon, Bamiyan and lots of places in Chinatown. Family-run ethnic restaurants are a good bet because they tend to be accustomed to kids and chaos.

Saturday night

2010-03-14T01:25:39Z

What a rainy start to March break. A peaceful day nevertheless. All the kids' activities are on hold due to the holiday week, and it is so liberating. What a boon to have a day to do nothing but relax, cuddle and loll around with my babies. Makes me think that it would be nice to have every weekend be like this one.

I made it to the gym, and took a nap with my kids. Perfect afternoon. The kids had sushi and phad thai and played with their cousins - I love seeing them play together, blissful and content. The Boy looks funny and cute with this two missing teeth in the front of his mouth. The Girl is always in high heels and lip gloss - even when she's wearing her pyjamas. The Baby is less cranky after 4 days on antibiotics, but feeling better and more herself.

The Husband and I snuck out for a movie this week. A needed respite after several sleepless nights of Baby not feeling well. Check out Ghost Writer if you haven't done so: Roman Polanski's latest creation is a subtle, brilliant take on political corruption and deception. Unable to enter the U.S., Polanski recreated Martha's Vineyard on the German isle of Sylt.

Monday Night Randoms

2010-03-09T02:49:57Z

The Baby has had a fever for four days. I have never seen her this miserable, and it's breaking my heart.
The Boy lost two teeth today. They've been loose for days, but were finally set free by a Werther's caramel given to him by his teacher.
My husband took me to a dingy club to see an indie band, Surfer Blood. They were surprisingly (to me!) very very good and I had fun. Weird moment of the evening: Bumping into the Boy's teacher (see previous bullet) there!
I've tried every morning this past week to get up at 6:30am and go for a run. For 6 days in a row I have turned off the alarm and slept for an additional half hour instead. I am disappointed in myself, but I will keep setting that alarm. One blog advised me to sleep in my gym clothes??!! May be worth a try.
I walked the kids to and from school today. It was awesome. The crossing guard near our house, Judy (an absolute gem) gave me some mango jujubes from a Chinese grocery store. They are unbelievably delicious.

Do you tweet?

2010-03-05T18:59:07Z

Twitter, twatter, what's the fuss?

I had no idea. I mean, really no idea just how out of the loop I really am. Last night, I attended an information session hosted by Jen Maier (friend, Urbanmoms founder, marketing guru, mom extraordinaire - these are just a few of her incarnations!).

During the casual get-together, Jen elaborated on the amazing ways that Facebook and Twitter can help us promote our businesses, blogs, network, and engage with the world.

I'm an avid Facebook user (only because one of our twentysomething babysitters set it up for me a couple of years ago and gave me a detailed tutorial!), primarily for keeping up with the news and photos of friends and family. On my Facebook profile, I share the odd blog post that I think may be interesting to my personal contacts, but that's where the business starts and ends for with with Facebook.

When Jen went on to demonstrate Twitter and Tweetdeck, along with everything you can do with these tools, I was amazed.

My skewed self-perception is still "I'm down with the kids and technology. I'm hip." The reality however, is very different: Sitting in my kid/family/baby bubble, I've gotten rusty, stale, out-of-date. I'm a stay-at-home mom who's losing her edge. So much is going on and passing me by so rapidly. Itunes and Facebook have a new format every week and I can barely keep up.

I'd like to stay on top of these trends and become more tech-savvy. I came home last night inspired and invigorated; I downloaded Tweetdeck and I'm trying to figure it all out.

So, tell me, do you tweet? If so, why? How as it helped you personally and professionally? How do you keep up? I'm dying to know.

Five Reasons Why I loved growing up in St. Stephen, New Brunswick

2010-03-01T08:00:00Z

My twenty year high school reunion is coming up. As I reconnect with old friends, and plan our get-together, I find myself increasingly nostalgic about the eighteen wonderful years I spent in St. Stephen, New Brunswick. The photo above depicts the NB landscape at its best - a lighthouse, the ocean, rambling old homes in the countryside. The stuff that dreams are made of.

There are countless reasons why I loved growing up there. Here are but a few that come to mind:

1. Knowing everyone. When I was 19, I had a car accident at the intersection near my house. My car was totalled, and I was thoroughly freaked out. Immediately, friends were at my side. Both my parents had been informed. Someone dealt with my car, and someone else drove me to the hospital. Within minutes, I was taken care of - part of a community that cared for me and my family immensely.

2. Afghan blankets, casseroles and home-baked goodies. At Christmas, Thanksgiving and often for no reason at all, friends and neighbours showed their love with homemade muffins, lovingly hand-crocheted blankets, freshly caught fish - you name it. When my mom made her special beef curry with rice, it was immediately distributed to her friends who favoured it. That was just the way. I loved that sound of the doorbell, cheerful greetings and delicious smells from another kitchen.

3. Not being scared. I was a Brownie and Girl Guide for many years. Part of the gig was selling cookies every year, and for that we had to go door to door in the neighbourhood. I distinctly remember walking around in the twilight hours, taking cookie orders from friends and strangers. I wasn't scared. No need to be. I was safe. I don't have that feeling here in Toronto, and I don't think I could ever let my kids do the same thing without my supervision.

4. Simplicity of life. There weren't that many places to go. A few little restaurants - mostly mom 'n pop joints, a movie theatre on the U.S. side of the border, and that was it. But I don't remember ever feeling bored. I loved being at home, with my family. My mom would make great dinners, we'd watch movies, spend time together. Life was uncomplicated - focused on the important things like school and family.

5. Maritime culture and landscape. Minutes from the ocean, a river, staggeringly beautiful coastline and countryside. I took it for granted. But now, living in Toronto, I miss that proximity to nature, and the ability to drive for five minutes and be in a pastoral setting. Non-stop urban chaos gets to me sometime and I miss the peacefulness and beauty of the Maritimes.

The Mens' Room? I don't think so.

2010-02-26T01:51:36Z

The Boy will soon turn seven. This is unfathomable to me. He is still my baby, and how seven years have passed I don't know. That, however, is a story for another post.

This post is full of questions. Questions that I thought were still years away. Just a few months ago, it was easy. The kids went with me to the Ladies' Room. It was a non-issue. Now, it's another story.

For instance, at the Airport:

"Mom, there's no way I'm going to the Girls' bathroom. I'm not a girl and there's just no way."

"But, sweetheart, how can I send you alone into the Mens' room?"

It was non-negotiable. He wouldn't budge, and I had to send him alone, my little man, into the mens' washroom, unsupervised.

All I could think about were lurking pedophiles, child abductors, and perverts - all waiting to prey on my precious baby in the eerie corners of the men's room, a territory completely unknown to me.

I couldn't control myself. After calling out his name several times and not getting an answer, I went in to look for him. He was there, in a stall, too shy for the urinals, and ridiculously embarassed that his mom was in there looking for him. Weirdly, the few men in there seemed remarkably nonplussed by my appearance. Maybe the barging in of freaked-out moms is not such an uncommon occurrence.

It happened again today at swimming. "Mom, there's no way I'm changing in there."

Good grief.

Shopping in India: From Roadside Bargains to Louis Vuitton!

2010-02-23T18:12:49Z

After a while, the eyes crave new things. New colours, designs, ideas - it's stimulating to the senses and invigorating to the soul.

That's how I felt when I went shopping in India. Everything is so completely different. and there is so much variety. For example, if you want high end fashion, there is Louis Vuitton, Gucci, Stella Mcartney, you name it. If you want jeans, or polos, there is Levi's and Lacoste. There's Aldo, Nine West and Hush Puppies for shoes. You get everything that you get here, but more too.

Along with all the American/Euro stuff, you get the incredible range of fashion that India now has to offer. India has always been on the cutting edge of textiles and design, but that industry is now on a completely different level. India Fashion Week attracts press from all over the world, and Indian designers such as Manish Arora, Sabyasachi Mukherjee and Rana Gill are gaining worldwide acclaim.

With three little kids at my side, I didn't get to meander and window shop like I used to. But, I did get out a bit and here are some of favourite shopping moments:

This is Linking Road in Bandra (Mumbai). It's roadside shopping at its best. My favourite place to shop in the world - you get great deals on purses, shoes, clothes and costume jewelry. The Girl (an established ShoeNut) wanted to live at this stall and I had to tear her away. The array of goodies is endlessly tantalizing.

In Bangalore, we visited Vijay Mallya's (one of India's richest men, and the owner of Kingfisher beer and airline) mall, UB City. The architecturally beautiful mall features mostly high-end retail (think Paul Smith and Burberry) and has a stunning rooftop terrace with a lovely food court (including Rajdhani, which I blogged about in my recent Food Post). UB City features a few good Indian stores. Kimaya carries Indian couture, and has some of the most stunning clothes I have ever seen - wandering through this boutique was like entering a fairy-tale land of lush fabrics and delicate embroideries.

I also loved the home decor store, Good Earth - check out this awesome bed!

And last but not least, bangles, bangles, bangles! There are shops in India devoted only to bangles - and my girls were in heaven. Check out the Baby here in our favourite bangle shop in Chennai, Dreams Come True (Prince Plaza)! By the way, isn't that the most brilliant name? I love the notion that finding the exactly perfect bangles will make all your "dreams come true". If only it were that simple!

Eating in India: Culinary Ecstasy

2010-02-10T15:33:34Z

To say that my taste buds have been dormant would be an understatement. Eating in India is like nothing else. Don't get me wrong, I've had lovely meals here, at people's homes and elsewhere. But there's something about food in India that ignites the taste buds with an explosive pleasure that I've yet to experience anywhere else.

This past trip, I made a list. I was strategic and focused in my culinary intentions. I had been meticulous about diet and exercise for the whole past year; but for that month, I intended to eat with abandon and relish, succumbing to the tantalizing offerings of the subcontinent. And that I did.

Going to Chennai, one has access to the best of South Indian cuisine. It's a cuisine that is becoming increasingly popular in Toronto but still hard to find, compared to your typical North Indian restaurant menu (think butter chicken, saag paneer and rogan josht). The typical food of Tamil Nadu is simple and rice-based - easily digested and quite healthy. I had idlis, dosa and sambar regularly; my kids especially enjoyed the dosas, which are light crispy crepes that can be eaten with a myriad of condiments, including my kids' favourite, butter and sugar.

I had chana batura, biryani, tandoori items, katti rolls (Chennai's Tic Tac has the best ever), delicious vegetable curries (okra, spinach, bitter gourd, eggplant, cauliflower, lentils, vegetarian dumplings...) with freshly grilled chapatis and yogurt. The fantastic meals were numerous and awesome. A few stand out in my mind:

One was in Bombay, when I visited my sister-in-law's lovely family in Andheri. They ordered dinner for us from Delhi Darbar, a Bombay institution that specializes in Moghlai food - kebabs, tandoor-prepared meats, biryanis and variety of other choices. We had chicken tikka masala, chicken tikka biryani, chicken seekh kebabs that literally melted in our mouths, cutlets and more. I cannot describe the taste of that meal - it was so delicious that I had to eat slowly and savour every precious mouthful.

In Bangalore, we went to the restaurant Rajdhani, which is an old institution from Bombay that has now been franchised across India. There is only one item on their menu, the Gujarati thaali, which is a set menu that includes appetizers like kaman dhokla, pakoras and samosas.

The main course consists of several curried vegetables, steaming hot phulkas and rice, sweet daal, chutneys and pickles. A heavenly meal that begins as soon as you walk in - as soon as your seated, the waiter sets up your thaal (a big stainless steel plate that has many little cups for all the various items, and space in the middle for rice, bread, pickles and appetizers)and starts filling your plate with savoury goodies.

Here's a pic of my husband enjoying his yummy lunch at Rajdhani (UB City location):

It was amazing to my husband (he's from Alberta and loves his red meat) that a vegetarian meal could be so incredibly satisfying. With the countless vegetarian offerings (they outnumber the non-veg options due to a largely Hindu population), it's really easy not to eat meat in India - and not to miss it at all.

A couple of days before leaving, our family friend Usha Auntie came over with an assortment of homemade chaats (also purely vegetarian cuisine). Chaat has its origins in Bombay street food, and is comprised of appetizer items like bhel puri, pani puri, dahi puri, raj kachori to name a few. When I was a kid, it was difficult for us to indulge in chaat because the food on the street did not suit our foreign stomachs. Now, however, there are lots of more "established" chaat restaurants (like Kailash Parbat) that prepare the cuisine with mineral water. Nothing outside, however compares to homemade - and Usha Auntie's meal was spectacular (her coup de grace was this unbelievable dessert made from lentils (yes, I'm serious - moong daal halwa to die for!). See below for pics:

Incredible India!

2010-02-08T18:09:48Z

We're back from our wild and wonderful vacation! The trip was amazing - food, shopping, family bonding, a multi-event family wedding and lots of sun. I wanted to blog more frequently from Chennai, where I was based, but it proved to be more difficult that I hoped with a clingy toddler constantly attached to my leg!

We arrived in Chennai after a long flight on Jet Airways (21 hours in total including the stopover), which brought us to India via Brussels. The Girls and I had a blast travelling with my brother and nephew, and the journey's difficulties (e.g. the Baby DID NOT want to sit down for a minute on the flight) were tempered by an excited anticipation of the holiday to come.

Our first few days were fraught with fatigue and emotion, but we didn't really have time to rest. The wedding festivities of my second cousin, Osman and his bride, Mariam, began with hours of our arrival, and we were swept up into the smashing, colourful festivities. Here are some pics from the wedding:

Playing dhandiyas on New year's eve.

The girls - my first and second cousins.

More pictures to come...

McDonald's in Chennai

2010-01-11T05:42:15Z

We've been here for two weeks and have finally gotten over our jet lag and intial maladies. My husband and son arrive tonight and I can't wait to see them. Last week, my daughter was missing her North American fast food so we made a trip to McDonald's. There are several locations here - we went to the one at Ampa Mall.

It's incredible how the fries in India can taste exactly the same as the ones in Toronto! I love the regional changes they make to the menu to make it more Indian. With a largely vegetarian population, the Indian McD's has many meatless options. We tried this one, the McAloo tikki, a burger made out of a potato patty, a bun, onions and lots of spicy chaat masala. It was delicious.

First week in India

2010-01-04T12:59:34Z

It's been five days since we landed in Chennai, and we are having lots of fun. I'm here with my girls and my husband and Boy will join us in a few days. The flight was long, with a stopover in Brussels. We ate Belgian chocolates in the airport and freshened up before the long haul to Chennai.

Setting foot in Chennai (new name for what used to be called Madras) was immensely emotional. This is my mother's hometown, and where her heart was I'm sure. We travelled here with her as kids; we got to know the city and it's magic through her. My connection to this place is her, and she is not here.

But today I'm here with my kids and happy to be sharing these lovely memories with them. As soon as we landed we were embraced into the loving folds of my gigantic warm family. We arrived at the outset of a fantastic family wedding and have been enjoying all the gaiety and colourful celebrations. We've applied mehndi (henna), eaten loads of delicious wedding delicacies like mutton biryani, kebabs, kulfi and more. We've danced with dhandiyas, sipped lychee sodas at a beautiful sangeet (music party) near the sea, and partaken in tons of family fun.

It's been a delight for the Girl, who's mesmerized by the unbelievably gorgeous clothes and jewelry, the dancing, music, twinkling lights. The wedding has taken place over several days, and the kids are enjoying playing with the myriad of cousins and relatives who are here from all over the globe. I haven't figured out how to post pictures from here, but I will do so as soon as I can.

Holiday pics: lots of mess equals fun!

2009-12-28T04:48:42Z

We just came back from a fun and festive week in Calgary with my husband's family. It was great family time, and it's always hard to leave. Here are just a few pics from my holiday culinary adventures with the Girl!

Stay tuned to my blog - my next post will be from India! I'm headed there tomorrow after four years. I'm so excited to see my relatives and participate in a big family wedding. I'm hoping to figure out how to post pics from there.

Here's the Girl hands deep in sticky sticky sugar cookie dough.

Here's our holiday staple: shortbread decorated with festive maraschino cherries!

Beginning the Gingerbread house.

And the finished product!

Happy Holidays and Thank you

2009-12-25T19:39:01Z

Wishing you and your families a very happy holiday season!

As I complete my third year of blogging, I just wanted to say thank you to those of you who read my blog. I love the comments and feedback. Even if you don't comment, I appreciate your support and participation. This blog gives me catharsis and a creative outlet. It also makes me feel connected to a larger world, when sometimes I can feel isolated as a stay-home mom.

I'm still in Calgary visiting with my in-laws. It's been a good, quiet trip filled with family. Calgary is cold, but pristinely beautiful and always sunny. We're staying mostly indoors and enjoying the view of the mountains from the condo windows.

The new year is approaching and I can't help but assess my year past, and make resolutions for the future God-willing. On my list are to not to sweat the small stuff, to focus on family, health, fitness and relationships - the things that matter.

On a more detailed level - I'd like to run 10k without stopping. I'd like to learn to make rotis properly (Indian flatbreads made from whole wheat flour). I want to go on long bike ride with my kids, and generally be more active outdoors with them. I want to enhance myself spiritually and strengthen my inner relationship with my faith. I want to try and be a better, calmer person and shed the petty worries that sometimes drag me down.

Best wishes for 2010 and here's to making all our resolutions come true!

Out of Sorts

2009-12-20T03:41:46Z

We're in Calgary for our annual holiday trip. It's lovely to be here and I'm enjoying seeing my husband's wonderful family. But I'm not feeling myself. Usually, I pride myself on being organised - lists checked off, and prepared for everything. It's not the case this time.

Firstly, I got the H1N1 shot and the seasonal flu shot on Thursday, and I'm feeling the effects. My left arm (swine flu shot) is very, very sore. Not helpful when we're travelling and lugging suitcases, strollers and small children. I'm also slightly feverish and achy. Uggh. I did this to be healthier, not to feel worse.

Secondly, I got harassed again at the airport for my name. This time, it caught me by surprise, because I was travelling WestJet, whom I'm previously heralded as being free of all this nonsense. Clearly, it has nothing to do with the airline - it's bigger than that. But that's another story. It's not fair for me to complain until I actually do something about it. Forty-five minutes later, again, we're the last people to board the plane...

I arrived in Calgary to realise I'd not only forgot the chargers for my blackberry and camera (critical), but brought no underwear or socks for my son. Quote from my Boy, "Way to go Mom. Is your brain not working?" I think he's on to something.

3 Sprouts

2009-12-15T02:14:41Z

I was wandering through Pistachio (Heather Reisman's fabulous store that features only eco-friendly stationery and gift items) when I came upon these amazing baby products from 3 Sprouts.

One of the co-founders of 3 Sprouts is Banu Khurana, a friend of mine from university. She's a successful Mompreneur (she began her career with Khurana, a luxury lingerie line that was carried in Barney's and Holt Renfrew), who has turned her passion for eco-friendly baby products into a highly successful business. 3 Sprouts makes gorgeous smocks, storage bins and hooded towels (and other stuff too) that are not only environmentally friendly but beautifully designed as well.

3 Sprouts has taken off across North America, and is carried in top gift and children's boutiques across Canada and the U.S. Recently I read that Halle Berry picked up several items for her daughter, Nahla.

It's one thing to have an idea, and another thing to make that idea into a reality. I have ideas all the time. But, where do I begin? What do I need to start a business? It's all so overwhelming and mysterious. That's why it's so interesting, and educational, to find out how entrepreneurs (especially those who are also juggling a young family at the same time) get started in realising their dream.

In an interview with Springboarders.ca, Banu talks about the acumen and strategy behind her business. Read that interview here to find out more about her road to success.

Springboarders, recently written up in this National Post article, is Canada's only business planning service dedicated to building action-oriented business plans that guide entrepreneurial companies towards profitable growth.