Dear lice,I'm normally a very tolerant person to all most creatures great and small, but I can tell you I'm not alone in hating you and wanting you out of my life. I'd wager (and win!) that even pro-life vegan tree-huggers all want you to die as badly as I do. Even Tibetan monks. (They shave their heads to avoid you, I'm certain.) Because you suck. Literally. You parasidic, reprehensible creatures... I want you all to die.Not only do you make me feel dirty and weird with your very presence, but the added workload of extra laundry, vacuuming, and the endless... More »

(continued from yesterday's post... still at the mall.)She: Mummy? I need to tell you something else. It's kinda bad. *looks at me with solemn brown eyes and then smirks*Me: *looks to the heavens* Oh my lord, child, what is it?She: Well... the other day? When I was at Jed's house for dinner? Well... I ate with my mouth open.At first she looks SO guilty, but this expression quickly morphs into smiling. I bite my lip. This is the kinda bad thing she has to tell me? Oh. My. Days.Me: *leans in with mock shock* Ava Scarlett!!? *clutches pearls*She: *slightly pained* I knoooow!... More »

This is a scene from a mall...She: Mummy, I need to tell you something. *picks up napkin and wipes pizza sauce from her mouth*Me: *takes deep breath* Yeeeessss? *feels stroke coming on*She: Well... *sheepish* I don't really like apple juice anymore.I swear to god, these kids...Me: *relieved* Oh. Well, why not?She: *cocks head* Well, I used to like it, you know, back when I was a little kid, but now that I'm a big girl, well... I just don't like it anymore. Because it's for babies.This baby of mine is currently the ripe old age of five, so I feel... More »

The day Brinley turned two years old, her will emerged. And it was a strong one, that will. No surprise there, it seems to be how we breed them. Two is such a wonderful, yet hard age. She is SO cute and her vocabulary and level of understanding grow everyday, so fast I can barely keep up. But then there's the tantrums, the potty-training gone awry, the middle of the night wakings and the frustration she feels from not being able to do everything her older sisters can.Perhaps it's the fact that she is our last baby, but I haven't been... More »

The other morning, Will asked for a picture that he drew at Jamie's house.  Let me back up.  Will's new favourite activity is drawing.  Without exaggeration, every day at school, there are 20 new masterpieces in his cubby.  Anything remotely looking like Scooby Doo or referencing the Scoob is saved...everything else I secretly chuck into the recycling bin.  I mean how the hell can he remember them all?  My mistake.  We went to leave, Will was in tears and his pants were falling off... so I said,'Dude how can you not remember to do up your pants, but you can... More »