Many kids are returning to school after nice Spring Breaks spent on vacation or at home with their families. While mothers often breathe a sigh of relief on that first Monday back (no more "I'm booooored...what can I do?" for another three months!), it can be a bittersweet return.Rice Krispie Treats offered me a unique way to stay connected with my kids upon their return to school. They sent me a box of their Rice Krispie Square Bars, with new wrappers you can write on, and suggested I send a little love note along with their packed lunch. They also offered me the opportunity to chat with the amazing parenting expert Dr. Michele Borba, about staying connected with our kids. Here's how they introduced her to me,
I knew I had a lot to learn from her, and confessed quickly that while I knew my five year old daughter would love a handwritten note on her Rice Krispie Snack Bar, and my nine year old son would get a kick out of it, I was hesitant to send a love note for my tween son. She was quick to assure me that while I'd get the least amount of appreciation from him, he was the one it was most critical that I stay in touch with during the day.
Research shows that staying "connected" to our kids reduces their chance of getting into some risky behaviours, but Borba acknowledged that staying connected is tougher and tougher as we compete with their peers, technology and their busy lives. As parents we need to get creative as they age to find a "common connector". I mentioned that my son and I watch Modern Family together, and she suggested that I pepper conversations through the week with mention of the show, to reinforce that we do have something in common.
Other useful tips for connecting with your tween?
- Especially with boys, it's better to talk to them when they're doing something else. Don't try to sit them down after school and have a formal conversation. Instead, chat with them as they're playing Playstation or ministicks in the basement. They may seem distracted, but they're great at multitasking and will be more willing to engage in conversation.
- Teens' preferred method of communicating is texting, so if you can't beat 'em, then join 'em. I mentioned that occasionally I'll chat with my son online, and while it seems kind of silly at first to be typing LOL, etc., it's just another way of connecting with him on his level.
- Pick certain times of the day where the entire family (kids and parents) unplug. No typing, no texting, no talking on cells (and in my case I'll add a fourth "t"...no twitter). Even if you're not talking to each other, it's a good break from technological communication.
- Turn off the radio in the car and talk. Again, kids are more likely to open up in a conversation when they can avoid eye contact, so that drive to the arena, swimming pool, or mall is the perfect time to ask the questions you need answered. Turning the radio off may require a weaning process, so start small with a suggestion like, "We'll have the radio for ten minutes, and then talk for five."
- Finally, we all acknowledge that the days of the entire family gathering around the dinner table and regaling one another with stories are gone. Lives seem busier than ever, and often families need to eat dinner in shifts to accommodate everyone's schedules. Borba suggested that it's not the dinner conversation that's important, it's the ritual, and families can develop their own ritual at any time. Maybe everyone meets in the kitchen for a bowl of ice cream at 8:30, or maybe it's on the couch with popcorn to watch hockey on Saturday nights.
I did send Rice Krispie Square Treats with written messages with all three of my kids the first day back to school after March Break. As expected, my five year old daughter loved hers and my nine year old son thought it was pretty cool. I asked my almost-twelve year old son that evening whether he liked his note. He looked at me sideways, managed a half-smile, and said, "it was o.k." High praise indeed.
Rice Krispie Square Treats are available in stores now.
Kellogg's is offering one lucky UrbanMoms member a great gift basket of items that parents can use to stay connected with their kids, including the Rice Krispies writable wrappers (plus a lunch bag and sharpies for lunchtime notes), a few games and bedtime books. It's valued at over $150 and it can be yours just by sharing in the comments section what you do to stay connected with your kids.
The contest ends on April 15, 2011.
The contest ends on April 15, 2011.
Click here for contest Rules and Regulations.
UrbanMoms.ca members are eligible to win so don't forget to sign-in. Not a member yet? Click here to join.
UrbanMoms.ca members are eligible to win so don't forget to sign-in. Not a member yet? Click here to join.
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I love these tips on staying connected. My kids are not yet tweens, but I still see the challenge in finding time to just talk. I also use car time to connect with them, and the morning. My 8-yr old son and I now get up at 6 together so we can chat, have breakfast and do his homework together before his rowdy younger sisters wake up and take all my attention. It's quickly become one of my favourite times of the day :)
Oh Amreen, I love that idea so much!! One big tip when chatting with your kids that I've figured out is to try to find that one-on-one time. Looks like you and your little man make the most of that!
It doesn't matter how old our kids are-we need to stay connected...so, after getting an 800 number for them to call from anywhere they are, I also stay connected to my adult children by using facebook and e-mails.
My girls are 4 years & 18 months...for the 4 year old, I write little post it notes and put them in her lunch on school days - she loves having the lunch monitor read them to her. Each of my girls get mommy time before bed - the youngest first with a cuddle in the rocking chair in her room. Then comes my older daughter's turn with stories in her bed and a cuddle. Even though they're so young, it's hard to make time for each of them with working full time that I take any opportunity I can get. Hopefully, once they're older and want to spend less and less time with their M&D, we'll still have some special times that are just for us.
We recently started watching Modern Family as a family. For a fun, lighthearted show it sure surfaces lots of good family stuff to chat about. We especially liked the unplugged episode.
Post it notes are my thing to stay connceted.
I try to stay connected with each of them whenever the opportunity comes up by playing a favourite game on the computer, dancing/singing with them to their fave song, and by reading with them even if it isn't bedtime!
I like to take my nephew for a walk outside.
I stay connected by having dinner with the kids at the table.
I stay connected mobilely, a text message here, and there. let me know where you are. It is easy when everyone is on the go, with jobs and sports etc. You can always send something that make them groan...Mooom! just for giggles.
tuesday nights are kids night, they pick the meal, and pick the wii game of the night, we have tons of fun, maybe not a balanced meal, if I listened totally to the kids, but carrot sticks and dip always gets a few veggies into them for the night. The wii games are fun, but also at the same time they learn how to balance money on such games as Monopoly.
Those are some great comments. One thing that I do is insist that there is no TV on school nights. This goes for everyone and isn't easy! The kids have gotten accustomed to it though and rarely raise a fuss anymore. Husband is a different story.
an effort has to be made,when my daughters want to talk they come first no matter what i am doing
We try to eat together as a family; although it is sometimes hard.
we always eat dinner together....it's the best time to get caught up on their day at school and the activities they are involved in.
I don't have children but I stay connected with my elderly aunt daily using e-mail.
My children and I have open communication. C They discuss everything with me.
They are 14 and nearly 12. Sometimes I need a defribrilator from what our Son has to say.
I stay connected with the grandkids via phone and skype.
Everyone in my family has a Blackberry and we use the BBM group so we can post once and everyone can read it.
I stay connected with my older daughter through email and phone calls.
We sit down and enjoy a family meal as often as we can.
My kids are grown but when my daughter was in school we would connect as soon as she got home by sitting together and having a cup of tea and talking about her day.
My girls are older now, but I did used to tuck little notes into their school lunch bags......sometimes on heart-shaped post-it notes......sometimes on other shapes, seasonally. Now I find that, when I want to get in touch with one daughter, it is best to text her or send her a private message on facebook.
I talk to them everyday and ask how school was etc.
I stay connected to my kids via text messaging.
We talk in the car. I have his full attention then.
We always have dinner at the supper table, no exceptions.
Getting to know their friends and having an open home where everyone feels comfortable coming to hang out is a great way to stay connected. Also being at every sports game / activity is a must!
Hi, my partner and I are parents of five children. We each monthly take each one out individually, for a meal or movie, to have special time with each child. It helps us stay connected to each child individually, and it helps build bonds, in such a large family, when special time at home, can be so limited.: )
we go for walks or bike rides together
I always take 10 or 15 minutes when I'm getting the kids to bed, to talk about their day. The boys have always been very happy to do this, I think, because by chatting away, they're postponing their bedtime!
read a bedtime story together every night
I am a loyal sports follower.My husband is a coach on our children's hockey team and i help him in any way i can.I stay involved in our children's lives.
We still eat dinner together almost every day-no competing technology is allowed during that time except my teen son will put on some background music. Also driving in the car is a good time for having conversations-again without competition from cell phones or radio.
We stay connected in various ways. Talking at meal times, playing games inside and outside, chatting during car rides. My hope is we will always be connected.
they are far away so we connect by email and phone
We stay connected at supper time, playing together and just recently I received some Little Jot's to write my daughter messages...a great way to stay connected!
Every Sunday I make a special dinner and we play board games and card games.
We stay connected by having dinner as a family every night. It enables us to sit down together and discuss our day and plans for the next day
These days I stay connected when driving my children. They are now older and involved in many extracurricular activities. It amazes me how much we chat about everything (trivial and important things) when we are on our way somewhere. I really get here about everything going on in their lives, and it feels so relaxed and natural. Other than that we get to use a friends ski chalet sometimes, and there is an outdoor hot tub. After a day of skiing, some major life planning and goal setting has occured in that hot tub!!LOL.
Our family assigns at least one evening a week for a real sit down dinner where the kids can talk about what is going on in their lives.
My daughter is 10 and she loves getting a surpise "I love you" note in her lunch.
The rice krispie treats with a writing surface were a great idea!
email, facebook, phone
Trying to keep up with email, facebook, phone and face to face!
I'll ask, how was school today or what did you do at school today? I won't take 'okay' or 'nothing' for an answer. They're not off the hook until they tell me something of value. It works great.
I like to have a 'date night' with my kids. Last night we went to see a movie.. just Mommy and her two daughter! Fun night.
We try to have supper together and we discuss our days, etc. I feel it really helps to stay connected and keeps everyone closer together as a family.
I stay connected with my kids by phone calls, meeting for lunch or dinner.
I saw this great article in a parenting magazine about bento lunches. Since then I make 1 or 2 special bento box lunches for my daughter for school. Each box goes along a theme of what stories we have been reading or something from a school trip she went on or from a movie shes seen. She has a great time surprising herself at school and all her classmates love seeing what shes got for lunch. Not to mention I get her to eat health with all sorts of veggies, fruits, proteins its so easy when its fun. They can take a little more time to prepare but well worth it and it makes her so happy to open her lunch and see two sheep sandwiches in a pasture or a giraffe of rice with asparagus trees and cheese and red pepper birds.
I love to take my children to different programs like "Mother Goose" and "Making Music". By putting it into my weekly schedule, it ensures that I spend some quality time with them. And I really make an effort to learn new songs and rhymes to sing to my children whenever or where ever we are... whether we're at the park, in the car, or at the dinner table. My children absolutely love it when mommy and daddy sing to them, especially when we change the lyrics to incorporate their names!
We have a movie night. We choose a movie, have popcorn and after the movie is over we play a board game or cards.
We have a movie night. Have popcorn and after the movie is over we play a board game or cards
We stay connected by having Monopoly night or movie night.
My children are 2.5 and 5. My girl just started JK in Sept so I like getting her to help me pack her snack for school and I often put little notes in there. I keep connected by being able to take her to school every morning and sometimes my job allows me to leave to pick her up afterwards. I have her help mommy prepare supper and we can talk about her day and I have story time with both of my children before they go to bed.
On the weekends we have quality play time.
I must not forget that I stay connected with both children by showing them lots of love everyday. Hugs and kisses and telling them how much I love them. You can't tell them enough.
WE connect with the kids by eating all together at breakfast and supper times and allocate saturdays just for us as a family to spend together
We stay connected by phone and texting
We are lucky my kids aren't involved in sports around the dinner hour so we get to sit down as a family every night around the table. This is a great time to find out what went on in their day and stay connected
We make it a priority to eat dinner at least 5 or 6 days a week and I still read to them both before bed.
I find that using any opportunity to talk and interact with my kids works the best... I organize family outings to various museums, events, festivals, etc. and use that, what they are seeing and doing and learning as an opportunity to talk to them about friends, family, religion, beliefs, etc.
My kids are older, so I use their tools. I have FB, twitter and I text them. I get more response quickly this way than using the good old fashioned telephone. I also invite them to dinner on a regular basis. They never miss a chance for a free meal :)
Meals together with no TV or phones.
t son has left home, lives next door to me- and I see him less than if he lived in another country. When too much time goes by I make some my best beef stew. He can smell it across balconies and is over for a "visit" in no time.
hehe
I text message all my kids, though they are far away
spynaert@hotmail.com
With our three young kids, my husband and I have monthly "girls" and "boys" nights. It is an opportunity for the same sexes to have special mommy or daddy time. We usually go for an inexpensive meal, followed by an inexpensive activity that the adults and children take turns choosing. It's nice unstructured time where we have the opportunity to informally chat over dinner, and share some laughs during our "activity". We are informally kept in the loop as we chat casually about everyday life.
Our family loves this ritual. At the end of our "dates" my husband and I thank the kids for sharing such a wonderful evening. Then...... we usually get our arms twisted into buying ice-cream and planning our next outing.
I stay connected by playing video games with my 9 year old daughter. She will often tell me about her day at school.
Post it notes,dinner,long talks and Facebook :)
Being a good listener and making sure they know that they can talk about anything without fear of judgment. we also play board games and make meals together and play sports
I'm really lucky that we live outside of town, and that means that we have a 20 minute drive together to swim practice everyday. My 10 year old son and I talk about what he did in school that day, homework, and sometimes just chat. I really value that time together.
reading them bedtime stories and quality weekend time
we take walks all the time and you would be surprised what conversations come up , and we get some fresh air and excersise too
I stay connected via email, and phone. My son has a knack of arriving just as dinner is being put on the table. I aways make extra, so conversation is always great over dinner.
I get connected with my kds via email and skype.
I have a teenage son and an 8 year old daughter. We try to have family dinners together and get caught up on our day. The tv is always off during dinnertime.
Giggling is allowed at the table too!!! Nothing formal here, we want to enjoy our dinner, chat and just enjoy being with each other
Family dinners are key. Making sure it is away from the tv and can concentrate one each others day!
When working I work 12 hours, so, on those days I see little of my children.I text my kids, as they are older. When they were little, lunchbox notes were usual daily.
Love to text message, gives me quick replies while staying connected + my thumbs get quite a bit of exercise also.
Use emailing for little ones! Send them ecards as we stay connected.
I use MSN and arm myself with some patience as the recipients have many windows opened at the same time... I must wait my turn for a reply, lol
My 5yr old often gets the short end of the stick when it comes to getting quality time with me since my now 1yr old was born. Lately, I've started date nights with her every couple of weeks we will go for lunch or dinner and shopping and a movie she really wants to see. It's amazing how much she opens up and talks when we are driving here and there and shopping by ourselves. I swear I learn more about her and what's going on in her life in those short hours then I do all week.
Our children are still young so I am still a big part of their daily routine. I really appreciate our dinner time since we take the time to talk about our day. Unfortunatly we have skating twice a week (right at dinner time) so we have family dinners only 5 times a week.
To stay connected we eat dinner every night as a family. We discuss both our "highs" and "lows" for the day. This gets everyone talking and it helps give insight and understanding to what one experiences in the day !
Dinner time is our time, there are no other distractions, and we can all talk about our day, good points and bad points. I find that it is one of the few times where we can actually spend time together and do this, although it can be a challenge due to scheduling and shuffling the kids around to their different events.
My daughter has been living in Auckland, New Zealand for the past year. I would have gone absolutely bonkers with worry if we hadn't had Skype and Twitter and Facebook and e-mail to stay in touch. The first weeks she was away we e-mailed a couple of times a day and Skyped every 2nd day. Just being able to see and hear her was a God send. Contact has slowed down as we both have become used to the separation but we still Skype once a week and e-mail when we have news to share. Call me old fashioned though, because nothing beats the thrill of receiving a letter written in her own rather indecipherable hand writing via snail mail.
My 3 sons and I stay connected by Facebook, email and texts. The way we chiefly stay in touch is to send each other, every week, some interesting video we found on YouTube, or online news article, or new pop or rock band, or new song, or even a funny picture or joke. Humour and music ALWAYS smooths over any conflicts, fears or hard times. In this way, I get to know my sons' senses of humour and musical tastes, and they mine, and they found out I'm NOT as old as serious as they might think I am!
I try to talk to them every day!
email, facebook and phone...everyday!
I stay connected with my son via email, and flipshare making videos of myself and other family members sending them to Eastern Canada! WOW!
I believe in good old fashioned talking and writing notes to stay connected.
really cool contests
We have dinner together almost every night. Even when some of us are busy, I find that we can all find that 1/2 hour.
We chat in the car on the way to school (the radio doesn't work) and we have family dinners. My kids do their homework in the kitchen while I make dinner and chat with me. I try to play a game every day with my youngest daughter and my husband reads to the kids before bed. Texting with my oldest teen is the best way to keep up with her activities.
We stay connected by having supper together every night.
I am a letter writer, but recently started twitter, which is the way I communicate with the under 25's in my life!
yes
We will have family dinners 99% of the time. It's so good to hear about the kid's days and find out what's going on with them and their friends.
We make the commitment to sit down and eat as a family at the dining room table, four out of five dinners during the week. No TV's within sight, not even the radio on in the background. The only noise is the five of us eating and chatting.
I tell them I love them !
i stay connected by getting involved in things my daughter likes. she likes to sing and dance, so i leave my insecurities at the door and just let loose and have a good time singing cheesy songs to her and dancing around...we totally stay connected and have a blast!
I stay connected with my kids by making the time each night for snuggle time. I make sure this is not combined with book time or homework time. Just time to cuddle, chat and talk about the day. Honestly my fav. time to connect with my kids is during the summer, I am a teacher and don't work in the summer months. I really enjoy our time together.
We stay connected with this really cool dinner game called The Family Dinner Box of Questions - we love it, and play it at least a few times a week, it leads to all sorts of amazing conversations that we would never have had if not for the leader question.
We try and have one night a week were it's just a family night. We have a nice dinner, and pick something as a family we will all enjoy doing on that perticular night.
Baking cookies together helps me stay connected to my kids.
I stay connected by giving them treats.
We spend a lot of time together. Our house is small so we're almost always in the same room, doing things together or else everyone's doing their own thing. Our family room is the place where everyone does things, instead of in separate parts of the house. I find this really helps us to stay connected.
I like to chat over baking or agree to turn of radio in the car and catch up!
I stay connected with email and text messages.
We stay connected by having family game nights and family "Walton's" nights. I like my kids to see how life used to be like before all the "rush" of modern life. Then it gives us a chance to talk about how we can appreciate a more simpler life. That "happiness" doesn't mean "stuff". At first they didn't want to watch "the Walton's", but now they LOVE it and look forward to those nights.
Wow. It is hard to stay connected with kids these days, but I have tried some of the tips that you have suggested. I text with the oldest girl, facebook with the oldest boy, chat with the younger boy while he's doing something else, and watch TV and bake with my baby (she's 14!)
I phone my sons and take them to dinner to stay connected.
I call my boys on the phone and take them out to dinner to stay connected.
Staying connected just means a little less tv and a little more talk and play time. I find a lot of things that my daughter is starting to ask questions about (why did a friends parents divorce? why Dad works and I stay home?) come up during simple pretend play with her Barbie's and things. Playtime gives us the opportunity to talk about things that might be difficult to do just outright. I hope we can always find ways to stay connected and talk freely.
I stay connected with my kids, by having contact with them together and separate as much as possible. Sharing a meal is a great time to chat.
I stay in touch with my nephews through skype video which they really love.
My daughter and I have a special time just before bed where she discusses anything that troubled her that day with school, friends, family, whatever. She really opens up when she thinks it's that or go to bed!
Before bed, we all get together in someone's room and chat about our day or anything really. We never planned this, rather it just would happen that when we say goodnight we end up talking. It's amazing how much the kids talk when they're not pressed to so.
We stay connected by having dinner together every night. I also use the time I have when I drive my kids to school and pick them up. That's when they seem the most open to talk to me abou their day
With my son (who is five) some of our best talks are while driving. Any other time, he wants to play or wander off, when we're driving he's got nothing better to do. With my 3 year old daughter, she usually crawls in bed with me in the morning, so we chat then and the baby (7 months) and I have long talks while I change her bum (lord knows what she talks about though).
my children are 12yrs and 13yrs and staying connected can be hard, we still try to do a family game night (board games or cards) or a movie night once a week and when we go shopping we spend driving time talking. texting or messaging them via their phones or the internet is also a good way to stay connected with this age group.
sitting down at the table as a family to eat together is one of the best way to connect!!
I like to take my daughter to lunch at my favorite coffee shop and have lunch with her. Being by ourselves gives us quality time together. This one on one time keeps us close and makes it so she will talk to me about anything.
I am a strong fan of Sunday night dinners.
I did most of what you suggest with my step kids. I guess times were a bit slower then and I made sure we had a sit down dinner for the kids every evening. I made the choice to only join swimming, ballet, music etc. that was outside our early dinner. The only other suggestion I have, even when they don't want to talk, I made sure they got a hug every morning and evening.
sitting down at the table for supper is the way to go!
I'm friends on FB with my son's friends...nice having that connection with all of them.
I write notes in my son's lunch to stay connected they are usually just little notes to say I love u but sometimes they are reminders of things to do after school
Great topic....so important to remain connected with our children is this crazy world. There are two thing we do in our house. Firstly, we each supper together, even if we have evening commitments. If we need to leave by 5 PM than we eat at 4:30 PM. Secondly, we have a family novel that we read each night before bed. Currently I am reading them The Hobbit. At the end of the chapter we chat about what we read. It is a great way to get conversation flowing. You would be surprised at the things they discuss.
My kids are still small, but even now things can get busy and we don't get a lot of time together. I try to set up things that are different and special that will stand out in their minds as special mom and dad time. Lately we have been letting the girls sleep in a pop up tent in the playroom on nights where we don't have anything going on the next day. We read stories with flashlights and tell spooky stores. They love it.
we all stay connected by walking the dog all together, it's great time to get fresh air and talk with eachother.
I think you need face to face time to stay connected. Talking, reading stories together, making music and playing are the ways we stay connected.
Throughout the years, we have stayed connected by always having dinner together. Now that two of my three kids are living at a distance, email, skype and facebook help to keep us connected.
write letters and phone calls
My kids are still small so I stay connected by spending time reading to them and playing with them
I have to use the phone, facebook and recently started using Skype to stay connected since my grown up children live across the country.
My son is living on his own and I stay connected with him by going out for dinner with him a couple of times each month. We also usually do some shopping as well.
To stay connected with each of my kids, we have a night during the week when we prepare supper together. It's a great way to chat and get jobs done at the same time.(not to mention the valuable skills they're learning)
I make sure that I talk to them everyday.
Once a month on a day not much was happening at school I'd take one of my kids out of school for the afternoon & have some mom time together. It was always different like going out for tea & a piece of cake at the bakery or doing something together. It worked great until they got into the higher grades & would've missed too much. But they still remember to this day- playing hooky with mom & having my undivided attention for the afternoon.
We make sure to have reading time with our Lil guy(4yrs Old ) and daddy and sonhave play time with our new puppy, and I always have my time with him when we go grocery shopping and he loves to make his pit stop at the bakery to get his yummy cookies(even though we always bake some together, my lil chef) And to end our night dad always asks him the question. "what was the best part of your day?"
I have a small child and we stay connected by having dinner with the family together every night and reading stories at night together before bed.
I saty connected by facebook. emails, and telephone calls. I prefer face to face too. Always making dates to meet.
Sit at the table without distractions - this means the TV is off!!
I try to always have a chat about their day with them when they get home from school.
We spend a lot of time together as a family. Even our extended family. We live the simple life and do so many things together. It's a joy really.
We always have campfires, nothing like lots of laughing and smores to keep you close.
Always trying to talk, keep that open dialouge, how was school, what did you do? etc.
We are big into sports as well, so that's always a topic of conversation and we participate in many sporting activities together.
I stay connected by always talking to my boy when he gets home from school..asking him about his day..also we always have movie night on the weekends..I always make sure I have time to listen to him and bond! ;)
Ihave always written notes to my 2 sons telling them to have a great day and slipped it in their lunch bags
We always sit down as a family to eat dinner and that is our time to ask each child and adult about their day. They each get their own time to talk to us without being interrupted. I also have always sent lunch notes in their lunch even before Rice Krispies came out with the writable packaging... which I use now. Just a quick note to say "I love you" or "have a wonderful day" sometimes a quote that I think matches them.
Shared storytime reading and playing with my kids are regular fun activities. Kids really enjoy it when I dramatize the character's voices and role play.
My son and I play board games.
My daughter and I sit on her bed and chat.
I love to sit and talk after the kids come home from school.I have a nice snack ready and while they are eating I can talk to them about their day
My family eats supper together almost every night.
We always eat supper as a family at the kitchen table. Everyone has to share something good and bad that happened to them today.
We always try to eat dinner together and I also try to get my boys one on one because I know they'll talk to me more if the other one isn't around.
To stay connected, we have dinner together everynight, no distractions or excuses! We chat about our days and whats going on with each of us. We also have our boys friends over alot so we get the inside scoop on how they are interacting with friends.
We Stay Connected through so many ways! I have a night each week that one child gets to stay up past bedtime to spend some time with me. We have a silly games, one of my favourites is the toilet paper game, Someone inevitably gets stuck without toilet paper and has to call for help well What used to be a pain now has people racing to be the one to get it for that person who is stuck. You see ... If you can throw it at the person and hit certain points you gain points everyone ALWAYS aims for the head, thats the most points!!!! No one keeps score, its just this silly thing we do and we always all end up laughing!!! We sing together , dance together and we also spend times talking about the tough times in life ... I make sure that i am always available to speak with my children. The biggest thign also is admitting my own faults! I feel by being silly, admitting im human and just being there for my kdis and giving them each some special time with me they will feel comfortable enough with me to just let go. So far it has worked !!
Before bed I always ask my son to name three things or events that happened to him that day that he is grateful for and happy about. Staying positive is a great way to end the day and also a great way to know what your child values and is pleased about in his or her life.
I stay connecterd with the grandkids by phone and e-mail.
There are a few ways I try to stay connected with my now 13 yr old:
-mommy/daughter go to the movies night
-at bed time, take time to chat & really listen to what she has to say (uninterrupted)
-stickers on her wrapped sandwich (lunch) saying things like "I love you" "you're FAB" "Smile!" "You're my star" etc.
-walks to the park
-I let her do my makeup, or paint my nails
-we go to the coffeeshop together to chat
-email
-I tell her that I love her every day ... and hug & kiss her everyday
-we have tickle moments for fun
We always have dinner together as a family and we talk about our day at the dinner table.
Love these tips on staying connected.
I have been using lunchbox love notes for a couple of years now.
I found that when I did not put one in my youngest ( 7 year girl ) noticed and wondered why?
Rice crispies treats are always a hit with childs of all ages!! ( me to!!)
Dinners together, and at their older teen age, texting and Facebooking.
We have gone with technology and will play Wii games together. As well the cell phones for texting is a constant.....that way we know what is going on without making a big deal of it and I find that they stay in touch constantly (maybe too much at times but I would rather too much then not enough!).
We are taking Judo classes as a family. My son is 15 and my daughter is 10. I'm doing way more more flopping then flipping, but it's a great form of exercise and a lot of laughs (usually at my expense) :)
We stay connected all kinds of ways, whatever works for that day or time. It's easy to text, so you can hook up with each orther. Having a special dinner, is also a great way for a more quiet time. Movie night, take -out night, bowling night, it all works!
I have dinner every night with my kids so we can talk about our day together.
We try to have dinner together as a family every night and then afterwards we watch an hour of TV together.
I make sure I'm there for her during her very special moments, like school concerts, trampoline classess, etc.
We like to stay connected with our little guy by taking the time each night after dinner to play a game of his choice. It could be a board game, cards, pin the tail on the donkey....or we are very much looking forward to the nicer weather so we can play some sports outside. Thanks!
A couple of years ago, I established having dinner at the table. This was a big deal because my husband wanted to watch TV (on the big screen) in the family room during dinner.
The compromise was we moved to the kitchen table and he still got to watch the news on the tiny TV in the kitchen. As a result, our family connected and communicated over dinner.
My husband passed away unexpectedly recently but my son and I have continued to have dinner together at the table every night. We even turn on the little TV in honour of his Dad. The connection and communication is even more important right now as is this little bit of normalcy in our current crazy life.
Every night we do a "best things" "worst things" and each person has to talk about one positive and one negative thing in their day. It helps us all think about and share about our day. We also eat supper together everyday at the table. Thanks
Everyday I walk with my son to his school and walk back home. We talk about everything on the road. We have dinner together everynight. We do a lot of things together: shopping, playing board game, watching TV, attending the parents-kids reading club, gardening, outdoor sports, etc.
In our house I have a son who is 14 and a daughter 11 and the way I find to stay connected to each of my children is differently than the other. My daughter loves to spend time with me "snuggling" on the couch after school while watching a favorite t.v. program of hers and we talk about the day's events. As for my son, hmmm... if I try to bring it up to him, he has no interest. So, for the most part I let him tell me how his day was usually first thing in the morning when its really really busy. Getting down to breakfast, signing permission slips and or notes or even homework. For being in his first year at high school he really has a lot to say. So, I am enthused that my children still have open communication for their mom and still want to share.
May I suggest the lost art of board games. It does wonders to cut out the chaos of the day.
What a great way to just say"hope you have a great day!!!"or "I Love You"!!
Thanks for the tips on connecting with kids. I like to sit down and read story books with my kids and play board games with them.
My eldest daughter (12) is a book loving fiend. One way I stay in touch is by reading her favourite books. Gives us lots of stuff to talk about. Her current passion is The Hunger Games series. Sounds a little scary from what she's told me but it's next on my reading list!
I have 3 boys and a girl on the way. I sometimes find it very difficult to spread myself equally between all 3 and soon to be 4. I love to send my eldest (7) to school with little notes. I also have special days (dates) with each of my sons to have that one on one time with them and to hear them out. I love to snuggle up with them on our oversized chez lounge chair and read them books or watch movies with a big bowl of popcorn. Dinner time is a big deal for us as well. I love to make a homemade meal and have everyone sit at the table, allowing everyone to talk about their day.
A good long mountain hike is always a great opportunity for connection with your kids
I stay in touch with my son and his girlfriend though face book and long distance phone calls. They live in Kamloops and I live in Vernon, B.C. When my son was little we would cuddle up together with a book every night.
I stay connected with my son by simply asking How are you doing today, or what kind of a day did you have. He seems to open up and talks about different things. I listen, give advice and do not criticize.
I find that going out into the great outdoors with no television, phones etc, allows us to just chat and relax. Mother nature seems to create an atmosphere that is condusive to enjoying each others company.
I have a teen and a tween - both girls and while we can connect when they are driven to or being picked up from the ferry (we live on Quadra Island) they enjoy Rice Crispy squares (we make them at home). Having a wrapper to leave reminders for them would be a nice thing.
I stay connected by using social networking sites.
my child is at that age - 14 going on 25! very difficult to stay in touch so I try to enjoy her music and try to put aside baking time every week when we can talk, listen to music, laugh and share our time.
I have 7 children scattered throughout the world, three here in Canada (one child and I are newcomers to Canada), one in England, two in Germany and one in Australia. Keeping in touch these days of computers and internet has become so much easier - I use Skype to chat and see my children who are so very far away, especially on birthdays and at Christmas.
We always sit down together for supper. I also text my son (age 15) and daughter (age 12) and set up my own Facebook page to see what was going on with them.
I use Skype to talk to my grandson.
I love taking my girls aged 2 and 3 to playgroups and different programs put on by our public library and of course before bed storytime...whereas my oldest 7 prefers one on one type activities such as board games but regardless we manage to have supper together as a family and chat with each other the most during then :)
My 5 year old has just learned how to write Mom. Every morning he rushes downstairs to write Mom on my rice krispie before I get down and I stay in touch by putting an I love you rice krispie in his lunch box.
We stay connected by going on bike rides in the spring and summer and when apart by text messages and facebook.
I stay connected to my kids, by always being honest with them and spending time playing games, and sharing my experiences of life
I have one child.. He is almost 7 years old and loves to talk and the best way to stay connected with him is to listen and talk with him. We spend lots of quality time together.. He writes me notes saying I love you and I want to hug you.
I put him special stickers and notes in his lunch bag and sometimes special treats to surprise him. We talk as we walk home from school or to school from home.. while doing homework, having meals.. :)
My daughter is only 3 1/2and my son is 1, we always have supper as a family and we do our best to get in some daily play time. If my daughter goes somewhere (ie visit grandparents) we always get her to tell us what she did.
I have a chalkboard in my kitchen and notes are left and replies noted.
Helps keep us organized and focused
We always try to eat dinner together and talk about each others day.
4 kids leads to a busy day so we always always always eat dinner together at the dinner table. Everyone talks about their day and there always lots of laughs and chatter!
I'm trying to set regular "dates" with my girls. They are still young (4 and 2) but I know they will be too old to hang with Mom all too soon
My oldest son is 4 and to stay connected with him I try to play his games as much as possible...playing cars or pirates etc...It always surprises me how much he says while playing.
I stay connected by making sure we all have a chance to talk about each other's day even if it's near the end of the evening...
I drop off and pick up my son from school everyday. We chat about his day and mine during that time. He's especially talkative and full of questions after school.
Facebooking!
We have a lunch date each week....just the girls so we can catch up in the news
I have a 2 year old so connection is easy right now. I am still his favourite person in the whole wide world so we can snuggle lots and just chat about everything he can think of! I love it
Board game night!
I connect with my family with twitter and facebook
I love the tips for staying connected with you teens, I have a 16 year old and find it very hard to find the right time to get caught up with him but I find long or short trips in the car work best. We put the music on I start with lite conversation and then slowly turn the conversation to things going on in his life but I make sure as to not make it like he is on trial and never push a subject he doesn't want to talk about.
I always end it letting my son know I am available to talk too anytime.
We try to have dinner together every night, and after Sunday dinner, have a board game competition!
With 4 active children, it sometimes can be a bit of a challenge to stay connected with each of them! They have diverse interests, so dinnertime and breakfast during the week are usually rushed, but Sundays are spent together, at least in the morning and then in the evening meal. We cook a buffet breakfast together, each making their favorite breakfast food, as we chat and reconnect. While we enjoy the breakfast (of waffles--and all the toppings, bacon/eggs--several ways, pancakes, french toast, muffins, chocolate milk, etc), we catch up on each other's activities, events, etc. Always joking, teasing, and congratulations--from events and eatablity of the breakfast 'speciality'--is the norm.
During the week, I will spend quality time with each child individually. My ADHD daughter and I usually make pizza from scratch--she loves to get out her pent up aggression/frustration while making the dough...throwing it down on the table, and punching it into submission! My middle son loves basketball, so I will be up at least one morning and practice with him, usually being the oppostition he 'deeks' around, charges then swerves, etc.
Whenever possible, we will all, or individually go out for walks (and talks), or bike riding through our local park, taking in all that beauty nature offers.
These activities, and others have helped to keep our family connected and close.
We have a good laugh everyday.
I LOVE all the stay connected practices and suggestions I have read from all you fine ladies! I am the stepmom of a 13 year old that doesn't live with us and we don't see until the weekend. It is imperative that his father and I stay connected with him, which we do mainly through after school phone calls, Facebook, and ITouch Facetime. We also make a point of always having special meals planned for the weekends where we can sit down, eat, and share our week's stories and adventures and his little 5 year old brother can have special time with his big brother cracking jokes across the table. It's hard to connect as much as we'd like to with him in a different house the majority of the time, but we try hard to always make him feel included, wanted and loved all through the week, even if he's not with us...
I always keep conversation open and ask lots of questions. Not nosey like but as in interested...
We text thru the day and when they are out if they need something or if I need to stay in touch with them
We always have dinner at the supper table, it's the best part of the day.
I make it a point for the family to have dinner together and talk about their day. I also believe it is important not only to know my kids friends but the parents. I want to be able see them and know them. I have 3 boys all at important stages in their lives starting school, high school and university and I stress to all that communication is the best. Also, keep your eyes open to kids that might not have a bond or communication with their own parents and you make sure to be an ear for them too.
Quality time together, whether it's shopping. going for walks...always keep the communication open...
My little guy is only three month old so connecting isn't a problem yet - we're still practically joined at the hip (or at least the breast)
I work shift work, so I'm not here as much as my hubby is with our daughter(10). But when I am home (after school), we always make dinner together and chat about the day. I'm glad that she loves cooking as I do. When I was young, this was my "me time" with my mom as I had 6 other sibling to share her with. I think that this time will also be her"me time" with her child some day.
What works well for me is to provide one on one time to each of my kids so that they feel extra special and won't be interrupted.
We are having dinner conversation with kids at the table
I like to cook or bake with my kids and then they tell me all kinds of things!
We have dinner together as much as possible. I keep an eye on them on facebook. We also spend a lot of time together at our cabin.
Whatever chores...making dinner, gardening...I get the kids to help and spend quality time chatting
We try to stay connected by having at least one game night every weekend.
staying connected with tweens and teens is sometimes hard because if you push too hard, you push them away. downtime, making dinner together, when driving somewhere, walking the dog are opportunities to allow them to speak to you about things on their mind w/o pressuring them for information.
I stay connected by spending time playing outside with my kids and by making Sunday afternoons our special family and going swimming. Those are just a couple things we do to stay connected to our kids as a family.
I stay connected with meals together.
Lots of phone calls and I'm getting the hang of emails :)
all our kids are under six, so we stay connected by having "family cuddle" time when my husband is off work. The kids love it!
Our bedtime routine is sacred! My boys are 8 and 11 and as active as our crazy schedule will allow, so some days the only opportunity we really have to connect is at bedtime. We snuggle in and talk about the day, the upcoming week, or whatever might be concerning them...it is truly a wonderful time together.
I use empathy to connect with my kids on the same level. They respond very well to it.
I talk to kids every day on the phone for a brief chat to stay caught up. I also spend every morning with my grandchildren to make sure they get off to school OK. I look forward to it every morning.
One way I stay connected to my children is try to make sure we have breakfast and dinner together. At these times we can just chat and discuss what was good and bad during our day!
Taking them out for ice cream - it worked when they were younger, and it still works now! It's hard to be grouchy and uncommuncative when you're licking a yummy cone!
My kids are 4 and 1 and we spend family time having game night, movie nights, playing at the park, going for a nature walk or having "play" time(my 4yr old will dress up and put on a sing/dance recital in her room on her stage) as well as actual playtime, craft time, we look at pictures of when we all were little and talk about memories of family (passed and present), we all curl up and read a bedtime story, as well as have our family supper as soon as my husband gets home and we talk about our day...just to name a few things that we do lol...we have a very close family and I think that its great to teach the kids the value of family and how it's important to be there to support each other and stay connected(not just for holiday suppers)...but all that said I know I still have awhile before they don't want to anymore lol.
Those are great ideas. WHen we go for walks, its a great time to talk and connect.
There are a few things that help me connect to my kids.
1. We watch TV together. I know that this sounds mindless, but some of our most important conversations have been the result of a side conversation of a tv show we are watching, such as what it means to be gay when watching Glee.
2. Gardening. My ADHD son has a ton of energy but is also really environmentally-conscious. Gardening is a way for us to do something together, in an active and productive way.
3. Whenever they want to talk, I stop whatever I am doing and listen. Sometimes its really random like in the middle of making dinner. But the fact is, if they are seeking me out to talk when it is so hard to get them talking at all, then I feel it is my duty to stop and listen. Not doing so may make them think that I don't think that what they have to say is not important and they will not ask any more.
I have teenager boy and I stay connected with him when we bake together. ever sence he was little he liked baking with me and now I use it to keep up to date on whats going on with him. meal time is another way we know whats going on. but when it comes to teens(or at least with mine) he dont always tell me everything but i done know most of whats going on in his life. I also have a toddler(22months) and i find it reall easy to stay connected to him right now. all he wants is mommy. lol
Rainy weekend nights are no-tech family game nights.
Rice Krispies have been a main stay of our family for too many years to mention. My pantry would not be caught without them.
We chat just before the bedtime story. Nice and quiet but not yet asleep.
I stay connected in a number of ways. I write notes to my children in their lunches. We go out together for a movie night three times a month and the drive home afterwards is a movie discussion event. I always wish them a good day when they go out the door and say I love you. I always say Goodnight I love you at bedtime. Once a week is a family shopping event for groceries so members can have some input as to what is purchased and learn about how to shop and what to look at. Those are just a few.
Rice Krispies is one of our fav breakfasts as well as the Rice Krispie squares that we love to make for a snack. Cheers.
My grandkids and I like to bake together, play board games, garden, kite flying, picnics and playing on our Wii. I look forward to their sleepovers every second weekend.
My kids are grown but I have 4 granddaughters, youngest is almost 3. I stay connected by seeing them on a weekly basis, sleepovers, playdates, baking and doing arts and crafts together. We have a ball :-)
One of the things we do is WALK the dog as a family. not sure why but this is when the kids reveal the most to us.
To stay connected we have 'family time' each day at dinnertime. We all tell about our day and discuss the things that matter to us.
we eat as many meals together as possible. I read to them on the nights I am not working and I try to cuddle with all of them at some point during the day if they will let me I wanna do it as much as i can now before they grow up and dont want to